Stoned alone

One More Time......

  • Mar27/09 20:12:55
  • Listening To Screams
  • Feeling Calm
  • Smoking a a Dream

One more time, i deal with getting yelled at for no reason, my mom wants one of my pipes this time, saying i broke all of hers, i only have 2, one is my girls which she bought, and one is 1 that i have, she screams at me, yelling at the top of her lungs, that im a piece of shit, i dont do anything, and for me to shape up or get out of her house... then asks me to get her a quarter pound, i just sigh, nothing i do is good enough...

 

Why do i do what i do without doing what i want to do?

I dont even know anymore, nor do i care it seems.......

 

 

Wish i had weed, thinking of a relaxing thought that seems to last for hours, but only dwindles but a few seconds, before im forced back into this form, into this mind, and into this place where im forced to call home, One more time.... 

 

I can call this place, something it isnt... "Home" this isnt a home, this is a mental prison, a place that isnt even ment for anyone to live, in.

 

Why do i even care for these people? why do i even deal with, there shit? Why do i even accept there agression, why do i accept there curses, there words of hatred, but yet, i smile and i nod, sighing to myself, why do i deal with these people... i wonder what i should do, disappear on the first or... just disappear....

Arisun Jul6/09 19:57:29
[Arisun]

i used to be in your shoes a couple years ago with my family. it was always my fault, even though their logic was flawed. i couldnt take it anymore, i let the anger out (probably not in the best way) and showed my parents that im not to be fucked with. tbh that didnt work, but it did buy time and a bit of backing off. i ended up running away to my best friends house where i am today and now my family bugs me to come back.

 Im not saying you need to go to the extremes but sometimes it IS neccisary to prove that you are capible of having your own opinions/thoughts.

i tried for "insightful" i think i failed on my face though.