Furry Profile Test.

  • Jan11/08 19:32:53
  • Edited Jan11/08 19:33:32
  • Listening To The Eyes of Truth
  • Feeling Bitter yet satisfied.
  • Smoking a big fat nothing.

So, the k-fox and myself were chatting up some new dude on IRC when he turns out to be a crazy nutter that neither of us would touch with a 10-foot pole, desipite introducing himself with enough of a friendly attitude and likeable posturing to accept him at first... of course, it was only a matter of time before the issues start to seep out of him, like oil on a paper plate.

So, it came to pass that it was suggested that a series of questions be created. A screening process of sorts for new potential friends, to make sure none of them have 'the crazy', as so many furs do.

It's important to establish certain norms. Obviously your average furry is a crazy fucker and this is frequently a good thing. Some of the most interesting people are 'out there'. However, on the other end of this crazy rainbow are the furs who blend in just enough with the rest of the crowd, until you poke them and like a guilty shoplifter, all the crazy spills out onto the floor of the supermarket. Cleanup on aisle twelve.

The most important topics to touch on are spirituality, social standing and sexuality. If you answer 'Yes' to more than four of these, I want nothing to do with you in the slightest. That being said, here we go.


1) Do you feel you identify with any major religion?

2) Do you live with your parents, renting or otherwise?

3) Do you own a firearm/plan on owning a firearm or have been in or have plans to be in the military?

4) Are you a fan of emo culture? (No technicalities here, you know who you are and what I'm talking about.)

5) Do you post on a personal blog more than five times a week or have more than two blogs?

6) If you own any sort of furry apparel (tail, ears, entire suit) do you wear it outdoors or to public places? (conventions aside)

7) Are you prone to interacting with other members of the fandom in an overly affectionate nonconsenual style? (ie, hugging without asking under cover of 'furry')

8) Do you believe there are people in the fandom who are actively trying to harm it?

9) Do you identify spiritually with your animal? (Believe you actually are a fox, believe you have the soul of a wolf, have an animal guide, etc)

10) Are you a member of the fandom for nearly 100% non-sexual reasons?


While some of these are fine by themselves, if you answered 'Yes' to four or more of these, you can go to hell as far as I'm concerned. XD


If you're a fan of these questions, feel free to use them to screen out the wierdos.


karma Jan11/08 19:41:59
[karma]so·ci·o·path       (s?'s?-?-p?th', -sh?-)  Pronunciation Key 
n.   One who is affected with a personality disorder marked by antisocial behavior.
karma Jan11/08 20:14:14
[karma]Oh, I fucking love number 8 btw
Kensuke_Kitty Jan11/08 21:01:57 edited Jan11/08 21:03:01
[Kensuke_Kitty]I like eight, too. Often, furs who are scarred by something personal sometimes take whatever happenned to them and take it as an affront to their furry identity and as an extension of that, believe their attacker(s) to be actively trying to undermine the entire fandom as a result. It's pretty paranoid thinking, but then again, lots of furs are paranoid. :P
Kensuke_Kitty Jan24/08 08:19:45



The test is going really well for me, it has already screened out a few headcases, saving me immesurable time that I would've otherwise wasted on some of these people. 

I need to get it made into a t-shirt or something. XD